God and the man
A man visits God and says "God, do you mind if I ask you a few questions?"
God says "No, ask me anything at all."
So the man says "God, you've been around for a very long time, so, for you, how long is a thousand years?"
God replies "For me, a thousand years is only five minutes."
The man then says "That's interesting God. And, for you, how much is a million dollars?"
God replies "For me, a million dollars is only five cents."
The man says "Really? Well then God, could you lend me five cents please?"
God looks at the man, smiles, and says "Of course my son. Just wait five minutes!"
Good Manners
A teacher was giving her class of small children a lesson on good manners.
"Suppose, by mistake, you step on a lady's foot. What do you do?"
"I say pardon me."
"Very good. Now suppose the lady, to reward you, gives you a coin. What do you do?"
"Step on the other foot to get a second one."
